When another ignores you

Have you ever experienced being taken for granted? It seems that although you have done everything you could, the other continues to ignore either your actions or your presence at all. No one wants such very difficult situation to experience.

In the time of social media when communication becomes easy and meeting variety of people is as quick as a click of a button, it becomes very convenient also to dismiss one person in another's life temporarily or permanently.

Know why.

No one avoids another without feeling uncomfortable with the other. It could be that the other is challenging another’s views, beliefs and perspectives. This means the other is intruding perhaps on another’s comfort zone, indicating that undue stress has been created that the other wants to ignore the other. Reasons could vary from taking time to deal with the person, to not being interested at all with the person.

Determining the cause of being ignored by the other takes time and objectivity. This means that one must separate his or her fantasy with reality. What should happen is different from what has happened or is happening. Being realistic and having an open mind on all aspects is important for the person to see the cause of the problem. Whatever the reason is, he or she should not deny that it exists and should take further steps to resolve it.

Take risks.

Regardless of what the reason of the other, the person being ignored must take risks. This means taking a chance to get the person’s attention again. This option involves hurting more oneself. It is not healthy, but the person must allocate time for him or her to do this. This period is “reconsideration phase.” Although it is ironic to say that there is something to be agreed upon, given that only one person does something, this step is essential for the person to avoid regretting in the future.

Living in the moment by taking risks. This means whether the consequence could be negative and uncertain in the future, the person must do what makes him or her happy today. If the person attempts to gain the other’s attention today, let him or her do so, until a significant time lapses. However, the person must be reminded that the duration of this phase must be decided upon prior hand. For example, three months. This can vary from one person to another. After that, if nothing happens, then proceed to the next step, instead of staying on this step forever.

Make a decision.

After doing everything the necessary things to get the other’s attention, then the person must make the decision. It is possible that he or she gets “a little” positive response, or none at all. This means that the person being ignored must evaluate whether the response was enough for him or her to be happy. Hopes must be realistic. Thinking that the response may grow in the future would not do good. Since the person has already gave himself or herself time in the previous phase, he or she must not go back to it and simply make the decision.

Taking more time is not what characterizes this phase, but it is the essential decisions the person has to take. If it requires the person to invite the person for a talk, then the person must do so. Asking the hard questions maybe required. If the person obtains the same answers, then he or she is left with no option but to decide on the matter. Remember a person can never be forever hoping for someone, who is ignoring him or her.

The hardest part after making a decision is accepting and believing on it. People tend to redo the whole process, due to lack of courage to stick unto the decision made. It is important to take time on each process. Whether to communicate or to avoid totally the person, the most important is to be firm, unless the person wants to continue to waste time and resources for a lifetime. :-)

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