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Showing posts from 2022

Surprisingly Unpredictable 2022

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Here we are again. A time to reflect on the year that is approaching its end. There were events that will forever be remembered as part of this year. Personally, 2022 is year of unexpected events, realizations and decisions. Tumultuous as it sounds but 2022 will certainly pave the way for a future that could influence how we think, act and decide. This is the focus of this blogpost. The year started with the surge of the Omicron variant of the corona virus. People were suddenly optimistic again, knowing that the virus was not as deadly as it was once thought, or perhaps as some would say the developed vaccines were sufficiently effective to prevent serious illness and even death. However, suddenly, the war in Ukraine started out of the blue. That has somehow affected how things are. Personally, the war in Ukraine somehow made me reflect what are the most important things in our lives. The refugees have to leave their families to seek protection and start a new life in anoth

Five Gifts of Kindness (Poem)

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I have been once told by one to be kind always Motivated to be like one to be worthy of praise Yet I beg to disagree for kindness is not a right Just for other's desire, approval and delight The world though is full of chaos and rudeness That being good to others sounds like madness Thus seldom a person has genuine care for one Or acceptance regardless what other had done Kindness should never be just given but earned Like attention should freely given, heads turned Be nice to others, stop all this cruel blindness Hence here are five presents as act of kindness First, individuals establish rapport to build trust Obviously confidence on one another is a must But trust never needs to be perfect at the start Just feel comfortable with each other by heart One could be naive to reveal secrets well-kept Quite uncertain what reactions one could get Trust is declaration of vulnerability keep in mind Hoping secrets enemies could never even find Some would relate trust with full

Living Alone: The Journey

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Five years ago, suddenly I had to live alone in a city I have barely known before. That time I had managed to get a full-time job, and a safe place to live. That is all I had. I had limited social network, but one-by-one most of them suddenly were at a good distance from me - then one day, I realized I was starting to embark a new path in my life, that is living alone in a new country. This experience is the focus of this blogpost. First phase: the newfound independence You suddenly have a lot of time to use, but you don't know where to start. You can hope things to be smooth-sailing, like you will meet people outside your home and they will immediately accept you as a friend. Yet, instead of motivating yourself to go out and explore, you hesitate. However, you are free to do whatever you want. No would care to know your whereabouts at a certain time. You are independent, and will continue to be that way in the near future. That idea of freedom is very exciting, but cou

Shikata Ga Nai: New Perspective

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The first time I saw this phrase was in Facebook. It caught my eyes because it is associated with being negative but quite common and seemingly normalized. It intrigued me because it somehow compares to the Filipino saying, " Bahala na. " Literally, this Japanese phrase means "nothing can be done about it." This expression has contrasting themes, and this will be the focus of this blogpost. Have dignity in difficult times. Force majeure, a situation beyond our control. This is perhaps a tragedy, calamity or perhaps an accident, economic hardships, or just as simple as an end of a relationship. All of these situations are difficult to handle. However, even these are stress-provoking, we have to maintain dignity in ourselves. Even though one has little or no alternatives left, he or she is expected to accept and endure the pain or consequences in a dignified manner. For example, if one has budgeting deficits, one has to accept to work for long hours. So be

Listen, Talk or Walk (Poem)

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Let us talk. Listening to you, I have now time. Here is a fine possibility of shifts of paradigm Creating a safe space to make time well-spent Yet requiring confidence in both to be present Put aside preconceived judgments or prejudice Or else, this triggers each other's nemesis Because bias would just hinder us to converse Our differences emphasized, things get worse There will be no exchange of ideas therefore No eagerness nor feelings of love or ardour However, do we have to mend issue on trust? Manipulation, power games are simply unjust It's crucial, both must feel comfortable and safe Express empathy to hinder ending up in chafe Yet, there will never be optimal level of rapport Be honest, not discriminate to achieve candour At least please have no bad intentions at me before 'Cause that could be a reason for me to ignore For a bad person can strike again by chance Mutual benefits therefore never would advance Unconsciously they'd might hide grudge at

Never Never Again (Poem)

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Life will never be the same again. As a result of being treated in disdain Looking back will never be enough. Perceived reality was just like a bluff   Regret will never be an option either. Even for me such an optimist believer Everything revolves on moving forward. Strong-willed now; that’s straightforward. This will be a marathon pressing on to a line. Using all stamina and power against a decline Never again to be fooled by trolls of the north Not like a lively dance step back and forth.   All other alternatives are self-destructive. Even the best suggestions are unproductive. There is no other better option either I see. Make things easy for me - that is my plea   Nothing makes the situation better but this. Any reconsiderations are definitely dismissed Things have permanently changed for weeks. Just downturns, no more recoveries or peaks   It was painful enough to induce silence in me Never visioned you going against me beastly Never imagined what situation I was even

What will I say to my 15-year-old self?

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I am 35 years old now, and I do not have problem to admit that my life twenty years ago was quite different. I was in my third year in high school, and life was difficult. I understood at that early age that the world is never fair, and it will never be. The people with power and money will prevail and attempt to dominate to whatever degree they would want, and the rest would have to accept this hard truth with open arms and try to do everything one could to get a better future ahead. Twenty years ago, every peso in my pocket counted. I knew I have to use my resources optimally to ensure that I could cover all the necessary expenses I have every day. I learned the value of money and learned living within my means.  I was definitely an optimist, but very practical in essence. I dreamt to have a better life, just enough to say I can live comfortably within what is possible. I was dreaming for whatever that is “better” from what I had. Today, my life is different. Looking back

Never question what love is

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I have been confronted several times why I give a lot of myself when I love something or someone. I end up even changing who I am just for love. Unhealthy it may seem but I will provide reasons why and how love as experienced results to unimaginable level of affection to another. This is to give answers as to how love changes individuals, even though there is really no point of asking a question about what love is. This is point of interest of this blogpost. I am capable of loving unconditionally because I experienced it in my family. Without question, without condition, love is just expressed. If it takes to do the impossible, to change the unchangeable, my family did that. I saw it. I felt it. I experienced it. I never asked question why because it was just the way it is. I thought that was the natural way. I did not realize that for some, love is so scarce such that they end up questioning everything how and why, being sceptic with everyone's intentions of affection.

Being with people who makes you uncomfortable

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There is one awkward truth that I can admit easily - I tend to withdraw from people who makes me uncomfortable directly and indirectly. By withdrawing meaning I suddenly cut or wane in my communication with them. This is because of a discomfort I felt brought about by my action or theirs. Those actions are not necessarily wrong in terms of ethics, customs or morals. Nonetheless, I can not withstand acting pleasant and amiable infront of people who makes me uncomfortable. This blogpost is about this. The discomfort of being with people who badly pretends to accept you. Sometimes, there is a disconnect between what others say in words and what they convey in actions. The ambivalence results in confusion, and eventually stress and discomfort. Worse, if the negating actions are too evident, such that the disconnect is easily detected. The discomfort becomes more complex as the other person bears now the responsibility to deal with the confusing situation, either to confront or veer away fr

Underestimating the Effects of the Pandemic

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  When the pandemic "officially" began last March 2020, I was quite confused on how I would be able to cope with the restrictions alone without my family and weak social network as an working immigrant in Norway. I had some unresolved personal problems with my family, friends and even at work. I was working full-time as a health care provider, as well has begun my Masters degree in Norway to further open more opportunities for me in the future. I had actually experienced a lot since I was young, but since the pandemic "has ended", I can now conclude that I underestimated the effects of the pandemic, and this blogpost is all about my pandemic experience. No man is an island, but select carefully who surrounds you. Humans are social beings. This is a fact. However, being alone as newly-established immigrant in Oslo, Norway. I really do not have so much alternatives. I knew few people because I was quite selective on who I will communicate with. This is something I lea

Could you be a friend? (Poem)

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  Who is your genuine friend? A friend everlasting. Confidant whose trust and company longlasting Who you are acquainted with since you're young? Not bothersome even at your slips of the tongue Or a person who holds your deep secrets now? A newbie but faithfully with you honoring a vow Or who when you are together initiates a spark? Fun, compelling - others pass not such benchmark. Or who saved you previously, but currently gone? From being present to swiftly quiet and withdrawn Or who is there, available but we opt not to talk? Positive yet communication reaching deadlock. Or who's different, deviant but still cares for us Contrasting behaviours, but open. That is a plus. Or who is like you? But chooses you not first Annoying, such a heartache that feels to burst Or who is there constantly when you need them Not buts and ifs, present and near. That is a gem. Or who you select to be with you though sadly absent Treating you inferior and unworthy like a fragment Or who you can c

Fixing the Fixation

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I admit that I am one of those individuals who have increased tendency to have an exaggerated interest into something or someone. I do not easily give up such thought unless I see literally no practical, logical and essential advantage something or someone has on me, or the disadvantages extremely outweighs the benefits of holding unto such. This is what I experience right now, but I admit it is still a challenge in its essence. This will be my personal journey of fixing my fixation. Starts with discomfort. Sensing the first signs of discomfort is quite difficult when one is fixated unto something or someone. The mind ignores all negative signs, and worse attempts to argue in defense of the fixation. The cycle repeats itself, and the fixation gets worse and stronger through time. The discomfort seems unseen, even though obvious telltale signs are present. The person may see them after sometime, but underestimates its presence and possible consequences. Enduring and neglecti

Life As We Compete

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I have been competing since I was five at school. I realize that the society had its way to give rewards to those people who excel and push themselves to their limits to be better than what others can achieve. I was too young to understand what competing means, and lived a life thereafter characterized by tough competition and desire to be better than others - a life I have been trying to relearn anew in the last few months. Never easy . Nothing in life is easy. Everything should be earned in the hard way. If you want something, exert something extra. To be noticed, one have to do something unique. To get attention, then one have to pour more time to be good to at least one, and avoid ending like a mediocre. Being good is difficult, while being average is easy but not enough. Quite simple interpretation of what life has to offer, but obviously false. The norms and standards are never considered the threshold of happiness. Should we find ourselves in challenging situations,

Thirteen Years After: My Nursing Journey

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Time went by so fast, and 13 years have passed. I passed my licensure exam in nursing in the Philippines last 2009. Since then, a lot has happened, and with that, my experience varied significantly. This is the focus of this blogpost. The day after I pass the exam. I remember that day. I was quite busy. Many expressed their congratulations. It is because I just did not pass the exam, I became somehow the talk-of-the-town instantly. Well, that will be noted in another blogpost later on. However, I proceeded with the plan of the day. I was helping nursing students in their thesis. It was actually a work that is in the "graysone" of things. We were actually doing most of the things for them - from revising to coaching for their thesis defense for a price. The payment we received was cheap compared to the quality of research paper we produced in a short time. I continued with that work for few months. So, I can say immersed myself in research, and fundamentally that s

Keeping Myself "Almost" Alcohol-Free

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There are several aspects that I certainly have control over. These include intermittent fasting, my work schedule, monthly budget, shopping list, routines at home, and being "almost" alcohol-free. I drink alcohol very seldom but I tolerate it, but I do not see myself drinking as a habit in the future. This is the focus of this blogpost. Well, I have actually started late in drinking alcohol, but have never been hooked to it to be honest. There are times that I drank quite often than I did before, but I managed to keep it at a minimum again in a very short time. I have reflected on this why, and here are some of the reasons: No drinking buddy I never really had drinking buddies, because often I am satisfied either by being with my own company, or with selected group of people. I intend to socialize with people who talk a lot, such that I could learn something. Perhaps, I have not met individuals who I could do this, as well as give me sufficient learning through c

No One Like Us (Poem)

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  Who really are we? Is a good but tough question. Do we have a life based who we are, or in discretion? Is there an approach for us to understand us better? Releasing ourselves from self-restraints like fetters   We have contrasting dimensions even in oneself There is definitely something beyond   the public self Charactetistics both for us and others are well-known Everything about us clearly to public we have shown   Besides there are things and traits we are blinded Try hearing what others say; never be close-minded Perception by others, we ourselves are unaware Society see something but we don’t, sounds unfair?   Be attentive, not everything about us we are in control Even how much we try, thus there’s always a loophole Intriguigingly there is segment of us we keep hidden Traits we withhold for life like truth that is forbidden   This a confirmation that every single manages a facade Presenting ourselves reasonably to be applaud In this way some people result in standing in awed Q

Small Acts That Irritate Me The Most

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Have you ever experienced being annoyed by acts of others that you really hope they never have done? Well, I realized these infuriating acts reflect how we as individuals have been brought up. This somehow reflects we as human beings, unique from others, and in this blogpost I am going to enumerate some of them. Leaving your used cup or glass after work Who are you to behave like that? Your cup is from your mouth, and you expect people to get your cup and clean it for you after work. Your cup is for me part of another's intimate zone, so keep it to yourself, not the entire workplace. How would people think of themselves? Next time, I would put my used tissue paper in that cup even you are still drinking. 🤣 Talking too much, but loses interest quickly Unfortunately, this is very common. For me, it is better to talk about your enthusiasm most to yourself, then act. Do something before talking about it. Some people talk as if they were finished doing things, even they even have not s

Easing Pandemic Restrictions: Alternative Perspective

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The last two years have been characterized by restrictions that aim at reducing social mobility, thereby hoping for reduction of the possibility of sudden surge of infection cases. This has been purposeful to limit undue strain to the capacity of every country's health care system. As a health care practitioner, I would, ofcourse, support measures to lessen the burden of all those working in the health care sector by pushing for measures to further reduce mobility in the society. However, in the past few days, I have been trying to understand an alternative perspective. This is the focus of this blogpost. Listen to this. I think everyone has to delve into the difference between deontological and utilitarian approaches. Deontologicalism focuses on the means, that it should be justifiable and ethically correct regardless of the possible outcome. This is the perspective of those against restrictions. Limiting mobility in the society means increasing unemployment, isolation and increas