Being Away from Home for a Long Time

The mere thought of coming home after several months of being away from home makes me feel very anxious. I know others feel the same. The reasons maybe complex but these are shared by everyone who went beyond their comfort zone in search of greener pastures. Here are the three most obvious reasons why I am afraid.

I do not know how I will react with bad news I do not know

This is everyone's fear. Being away for a significant length of time, family and friends would sometimes opt not to tell you some bad news, especially when it can make one confused and distracted. Instead of being able to deal with the problem, I fear if this will happen to me that I am left with no option but to cope as fast as I could, especially when I can not do something about it. Although, I just hope that I can handle pretty well. Wish me luck.

I do not know whether I could keep up with high expectations

Ofcourse, this is an inenvitable fear. People would ask how I was in the last few months. Whether I am contented with new experience in a foreign country or not, people will always say at least I am better level than them in their perspective. Some of them would make requests and not-so-well-thought advances perhaps to me. I will be honest and if I can not meet I will say so. There is no point in meeting the expectations of others. The most important thing is that I will meet my objective in coming home - to enjoy time with family and friends, not to primarily to spend or please them.

I do not know whether I am still relevant to everything I left

It is a reassuring thing that people would want one to be back and still being considered important and wanted. However, what if the contrary will happen? This makes me feel very anxious. I hope people would still remember the good things I have done and understand those things that were not. Worst in my mind is that people forgets everything. I remain optimistic that people still hold memories between them and me.

Anxiety is the fear of the unknown. Ironically, I have just stated my reasons why I am afraid. However, those reasons are filled of uncertainty.  This uncertainties will be answered once I truly come home and see reality. Whether it will be good or bad, the most important thing is how I cope afterwards.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular This Week

Cebuano: The Language and The People

Image
Living in Norway for over 2 years, I have often encountered questions about the languages I speak. I usually answered I speak Norwegian, English and two Filipino languages. Then, people start asking if the second Filipino language is a dialect of the other. Given my mother tongue is Cebuano, the second language referred, I abruptly debunk the misconcept that it is a mere dialect. My most common explanation is that all Filipinos speak the Filipino language, but those who only learn to speak Filipino have difficult time understanding or communicating with one speaking Cebuano. Throughout the span of my childhood, I got to grasp the political and cultural differences of Filipinos speaking Filipino language or Tagalog as referred by most, and those coming from the Southern Philippines speaking Cebuano. The language in itself has become the boundary between the two groups of people. Due to their innate differences, misunderstandings result, not because of mere language confusion, but of cu
Read more

Crab Mentality among Filipinos

Image
Many times people get accused of possessing the Filipino negative trait of crab mentality. It is  a state wherein people act like crabs when put inside a basket or a container, pull each other down for them to get out from it. One must further dissect the magnitude of the problem and reasons behind it to distinguish ways on how to deal with it and perhaps minimize it. One of my Facebook friend said that crab mentality among Filipinos is already a disease. The way she said it, it seems crab mentality can no longer be cured and is highly contagious. It is quite true because based on my observation, we can notice crab mentality everywhere. One time I made a comment in Youtube about one issue that lead some Filipino netizens to react. I was expecting they will provide further valuable insights about what I said. I have no problem with others disagreeing with my thoughts, given that everyone is entitled with their own thoughts. Suprisingly, one of those who commented, criticized my u
Read more

3 Comparisons Between Norwegian and Filipino Values

Image
I am entering my fifth year of residing in Norway. Many things have happened during this short period of time, both good and bad. However, one of that is worthy to highlight is how I realized the big contrast between prevailing values between Norwegian and Filipino cultures. I can only talk about these two in particular, although there are somehow similiraties between the Norwegian culture with those of coming from Europe, as well that with Filipino and other Asian societies. This blogpost will present three comparative points to exhibit the diversity of culture. COMPARISON 1 Norwegian: Able decide independently for oneself Filipino: To fight for what is most important Freedom and passion may not be on the same side always. Freedom is the ultimate virtue in the Norwegian culture. One may or may not be passionate of what Norwegians are doing, but most important is that they decided on them by themselves, such that no one has dictated on them what they are supposed to do.
Read more

Filipino Body Language

Image
Non-verbal communication is an essential part in a society, as well as understanding the values the community believe in. This reflects a good overview of how communication and tradition have evolved through time. These expressions are never constant, such that meaning changes from time to time, and is greatly affected by the events or the kind of environment one belongs in. Filipinos, being a society with mixed Asian and Western influences have unique facial and body expressions. These are the focus of this blogpost. 1. Silent stare Stares could mean evil look for Filipinos. It may indicate sarcasm or manipulation. It is considered rude to this, especially when in a conversation because it may also indicate disinterest or disrespect. 2. Lip/Eye pointing This is quiet funny gesture common not just in the rural areas, but also in urban communities. It is quiet hard to explain the direction in verbal language, so it is better to point them vaguely, interestingly with the use of lips,
Read more

Bullying: A Part of Filipino Culture?

Image
Bullying became a hot topic in Norway today after a young teenager died of emaciation due to eating disorder that was primarily linked to anxiety from bullying at school. This was quite taboo in this Scandinavian country, given the nation is very keen on respecting socio-cultural differences and on protection against any form of discrimination. Discussions have been made on how to handle and prevent bullying and who takes the responsibility in these cases, whether the family, school or the State. Personally, I was not reacting in anyway as my mind says the concept is remote and almost impossible to happen in the Philippines. Perhaps, I was referring it to death, but not to bullying. However, after several days I was quite uneasy on the topic and further asked myself if I was ever bullied before and what it has caused me in the long-term basis. To my surprise, bullying was a crucial point in my childhood. My coping skills allowed me to hide in my consciousness what had happened
Read more

7 Reasons Why Many Filipinos are Good Singers

Image
One thing that makes me proud of being Filipino is that there are many good singers in our country. I am not saying that the Philippines has the best singers in the world, but it is obvious that many Filipinos have showed to the world the God-given talent they have. 1. Parents encourage their children to develop their singing talents Children singing old songs and acting as if the song fits them well. Love songs, rock, whatever genre songs maybe Filipino children can sing that. Some even report that children learn humming a melody before able to speak well. Ofcourse, parents are very crucial in the development of this talents. If a talent has been acknowledged at an early age, this provides time for child to improve his or her talent in singing. Watch the newly-launced TV show Voice Kids Philippines. 2. Competition helps produce more good singers The most-watched Television shows in the Philippines are singing competition. Most artists are discovered in these platform
Read more

Solve: Why Math is Hard?

Image
Before I became a nurse, teacher, licensed real estate appraiser, I became first as a mathematics lover. Some consider me a geek then, but I was not, I just simply love the logic of mathematics. Now, I can say my mathematics skills have deteriorated significantly, when I am confronted with numbers, I do not leave my chair not until I somehow figure out what could be the problem. So, why then mathematics is difficult to many of us? Is there something can be done? Mathematics is much more than counting and simple arithmetic. It is a cumulative science in which new results are built upon and depend on earlier results. Humans have accumulated a huge amount of mathematical knowledge – far    more than a person can learn in a lifetime, even if the person spent all of their time studying mathematics. This history perhaps will give us the impression the necessity of mathematics. We may not appreciate the subject, but it useful because without it, the world will end up in chaos, for sure
Read more

Debt of Gratitude: A Filipino Social Phenomenon

Image
"Scratch my back and I will scratch yours." - This describes the prevailing Filipino social phenomenon of debt of gratitude. It is an attempt of one to repay the other, who in the past had done something good or beneficial to him or her. This has been magnified by other social phenomena such as the continued emigration of Filipino workers outside the Philippines, such that remittances are actually in the form of payment to their families, as an expression of long-lasting debt of gratitude. This is just an example of how this phenomenon has shaped the Filipino society and culture. In this blogpost, an in-depth analysis will be made to showcase the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomena, as various concepts and ideas revolving around it are enumerated throughout the discussion. 1. It exists in any type of relationship; familial, working, spiritual and others. Because of man's social nature, there will be periods of self-sufficiency and vulnerability. During time
Read more

Bangkok, Thailand: Land of Smiles - Day 2

Image
After a very tiring but fulfilling day in the Land of Smiles, we were now ready to take the second and the last day of our short stop in Bangkok. Gaining a good grasp of the Bangkok public transport systen, we tried to avoid taking the taxi to save money and avoid traffic due to the yuletide season. From our hotel, we took the City Airport Link and BTS to the Central Pier of Chao Phraya Boat Express. Using the Orange Line, we took the boat to Tha Tien boat station. The station has some small stalls where one can buy some travel souvenirs. Items are sold starting from 200 baht (50 NOK). After a short walk, we were able to reach the the walls of Grand Palace, our first stop of the day. One must be warned not to take any entrance aside from the major entrance to avoid extra expenses from tour agent,who are taking advantage. There is a strict dress code, so one must avoid exposing too much skin when entering the premise. Since Grand Palace is a major tourist attracti
Read more

Shikata Ga Nai: New Perspective

Image
The first time I saw this phrase was in Facebook. It caught my eyes because it is associated with being negative but quite common and seemingly normalized. It intrigued me because it somehow compares to the Filipino saying, " Bahala na. " Literally, this Japanese phrase means "nothing can be done about it." This expression has contrasting themes, and this will be the focus of this blogpost. Have dignity in difficult times. Force majeure, a situation beyond our control. This is perhaps a tragedy, calamity or perhaps an accident, economic hardships, or just as simple as an end of a relationship. All of these situations are difficult to handle. However, even these are stress-provoking, we have to maintain dignity in ourselves. Even though one has little or no alternatives left, he or she is expected to accept and endure the pain or consequences in a dignified manner. For example, if one has budgeting deficits, one has to accept to work for long hours. So be
Read more